Direct and honest Streatham-living subject of Personal Services. Money-mad erstwhile madam who will perform an Afternoon of Innocent Cyn at the Edinburgh Festival.

Celebrated former brothel-keeper who used to hate going to bed on her own and now does after-dinner speaking. Sex-fascinated woman who threw the famous luncheon voucher parties and would like to be Minister of Brothels or an agony aunt.

This is the image of Cynthia Payne.

Does she believe in God? ‘I’m a Spiritualist more than anything. I’ve been going to Spiritualist meetings off and on for 25 years. But I’ve never really had any proof of life after death.’ And is money important to her? ‘Yes, because I become very insecure without it.’

She’s wearing a leopard-skin print dress and black high heels. ‘I’ve always dressed a bit like the Queen Mum really. Go on, next question.’ She speaks in a cockney voice with a hard edge; a voice that failed at elocution lessons and which she calls racy and on the common side.

‘I like leopard skin and Loony Party colours because I go around to different elections with screaming Lord Sutch ha ha.’ She says ‘sex’ and ‘money’ – her characteristic trick – to produce a smile for the camera. ‘I’ve also got three nice fur coats. But I can’t wear them because I do a lot of animal campaign work – and you can’t wear a lovely fur coat when you’re doing that.’

She dons a tartan jacket and skirt to buy the groceries. She also comes equipped with elegant earrings, necklace and amethyst and diamond ring. ‘During the day I look very much like an ordinary Streatham woman. You’d never think I was a retired brothel-keeper if you saw me in the shops in my brogues.’

So how would she describe herself physically? She’s short with big boobs and wears a Margaret Thatcher-ish wig. ‘I wear all different types of wig . . . I’ve forgotten the question now . . . Oh yes, I am plump, but I’ve always had a nice pair of legs.’ She lets rip with a dirty laugh. ‘I’m busty, aren’t I?’ There is also a beady toughness in her eyes. ‘What would I change? Well, what woman doesn’t want to improve her body? I’d like to knock a stone off, but I’ve got no willpower. My outlet is eating.’

And what about sex? ‘Oh, everybody wants to know about my sex life!’ She gives another huge dirty laugh. ‘I’ve never found it embarrassing to talk about sex. I’m just fascinated with it. I understand men . . . ‘But English men are so inhibited, aren’t they? I find that I have to do all the running. Even more now that I’m infamous.’ She clearly gets on better with men than women – and both the male photographer and the taxi driver melted visibly in her presence. Does she think she’s sexy? ‘I suppose I could be with the right man.’

So what sort of man would she like? ‘Somebody like Inspector Colin White what raided me. Every time I had a raid, I got a police boyfriend out of it. I find policemen and firemen very attractive. But weak men seem to be attracted to me – which is annoying.’

For 25 years she had a ‘slave’ who idolised her and cleaned for her. ‘But I seem to fall in love with the wrong men – men who don’t give two hoots about me, really. Of course that hurts me.’

And does she feel shame about the things she’s done? Any hang-ups? ‘No, naaah, no. Other people have the hang-ups. I told a vicar recently that if there’s a heaven, I’m going there. I even went to an S and M party the other day – I thought I couldn’t be the Sex Goddess and not go to one – I found my parties were very tame by comparison.’

She’s 58. ‘Oh, I hate getting older – because I want to do it all over again.’ (Another dirty laugh.) ‘When you’re young you’ve got your life in front of you, you can be optimistic – but I’m not so optimistic now.’ I like and feel sorry for her and ask whether she feels sorry for herself. ‘No, but I feel sad that all this happened to me.’ She makes big efforts to be entertaining and fun. But this sense that she is tired, sad and disillusioned recurs frequently during the interview.

Is she? ‘No, naaah, no. I’m tired because I’ve been up since six. I do feel that I’ve had it all, that I’ve done everything. But I wouldn’t say I was disillusioned. I suppose I feel I’ve fulfilled my ambition – I’ve always wanted to be famous because as a child I was always seeking recognition and never getting it. But fame’s not all it’s cracked up to be – I can’t easily go away for a dirty weekend, for instance, because I’m too well-known.’ Later she says that running a brothel fulfilled a need in her. ‘I suppose for once in my life I felt wanted. But now it’s all stopped I don’t feel useful any more.’ She looks doleful.

So how would she describe herself? ‘Now what was it I said to you in the kitchen? Oh yes. My morals have always been low, but my ethics are high.’ She cackles then pauses.

‘I don’t think I’m prim, but people think I am. I’m kind, soft and tough but not hard enough. I’m tough considering what I’ve been through in life – most people would have had a nervous breakdown. But if anything terrible happens, like when I went to prison, I think ‘right, I’m going to learn from this’. I do tend to see the positive side and turn things to my advantage. ‘My warmth of nature is my most important characteristic. And what don’t I like? Well, I talk too much – but if I didn’t, I wouldn’t be me. I don’t know why I do, it’s not even nerves. I’ve always been outgoing. In prison I kept quiet for four months – and it was very boring. The only people worth talking to were the murderesses – because most of them are on drugs in Holloway – who were very hard nuts, but at least I could have a conversation with them.’

The character of a madam is generally portrayed as being quite hard. ‘They always play me as being a tough businesswoman. But to be a successful Madame, I don’t think you can be hard. Men and the girls come to tell you their problems. ‘I think as a madam you understand human nature more.’